THEDADABASE centralized. dadified. terrible.
+ Submit a Joke

Browse Dad Jokes

// filtered by #FoodAndDrinks — 76
I just quit my terrible job at the candy store. So long, suckers!
Avg ★ ★ ★ ★
Rate
FoodAndDrinks Work
My lettuce got angry with me and said, "Oh kale no!"
Avg ★ ★ ★ ★
Rate
FoodAndDrinks OneLiner Plants BetterOutLoud
Most people don't realize the angriest nut is the the pissed-achio.
Avg ★ ★ ★ ★
Rate
FoodAndDrinks BetterOutLoud
My wife wanted me to put ketchup on the shopping list. Now I can't read any of it!
Avg ★ ★ ★ ★
Rate
FoodAndDrinks Relationships Shopping
Why do shooting stars taste better than comets? They are a little meteor.
Avg ★ ★ ★ ★
Rate
FoodAndDrinks FunFact Space BetterOutLoud
I heard a celebrity chef recently died. He pasta way. You know, as people, we cannoli do so much, and ultimately we'd like for our legacy to become a pizza history. In the end, we all run out of thyme.
Avg ★ ★ ★ ★
Rate
Culture FoodAndDrinks Funeral Pun-Ishing
I'm pretty sure toasters were the first form of popup notifications.
Avg ★ ★ ★ ★
Rate
Deepthoughts FoodAndDrinks FunFact
I find it interesting that "muffins" spelled backwards is the action you do when you take them out of the oven.
Avg ★ ★ ★ ★
Rate
Deepthoughts FoodAndDrinks OneLiner Words
When a bee landed near some sushi, the sushi said, "Wasabi?"
Avg ★ ★ ★
Rate
Animals Classic FoodAndDrinks OneLiner
If you put one lasagna on top of another lasagna, I'm not sure if it's still two lasagnas or if it becomes one lasagna. But what I do know is that we're going to have a good time!
Avg ★ ★ ★ ★
Rate
Deepthoughts FoodAndDrinks FunFact
I think I have an addiction to apples, but I can't seem to find a doctor who will see me.
Avg ★ ★ ★ ★
Rate
Addiction FoodAndDrinks Medical
My friend is having a baby soon, she wanted my advice on naming her little girl Madeline. I told her I wasn't sure that name fit. She asked about about the name Margarine instead. I told her that was not butter.
Avg ★ ★ ★ ★
Rate
FoodAndDrinks Kids